Why break-ups, family deaths, & personal disasters can be good for copywriting

In 2017, I was 30 years old, living in Fort Collins, Colorado. 

I had already quit my PhD and had a semester of writing copy professionally under my belt. 

In March, I was supposed to fly to Hawaii for 2 months to co-work, write copy, and learn from Dan Ferrari, one of the best copywriters in the industry. 

But the day before I left, something catastrophic happened…

Something I haven’t shared with a lot of people. 

The girl I had been dating for 3 years called me on the phone and broke up with me. 

The reason why she did it…

Was because her brother had found videos of my dating advice business online…

Where I was yapping on Youtube, teaching men how to be confident with women. 

Needless to say, it wasn’t a good look for her family. 

So for the first 2 weeks in Hawaii, instead of enjoying my time…

I was crying every day, trying to deal with the gut-wrenching pain of a break-up. 

I truly did love her. 

I thought I was going to marry her. 

And if the universe didn’t force this lesson on me…

I would’ve never had the ability to leave her, even though now I know she wasn’t the right person for me. 

The reason I share this story is because I’ve noticed something weird in my life…

Something that I’ve noticed in other copywriters as well. 

That’s this:

I think our major life lessons are predetermined. 

Like, before you come down to Earth to live your life…

Your soul decides major moments in your life where you have to go through massive turbulence…

Experience major pain…

Go through some “forced growth” and massive up-leveling...

And come out the other side with a lesson that is worth more than its weight in gold. 

I’ve seen it happen multiple times in my life. 

There were 2 major heartbreaks I had to go through. 

The death of my father to lung cancer. 

And a 3 year legal battle where I had to get a restraining order for a stalker. 

But when I look back at each of these experiences, I’m grateful for them. 

At the time, it really, really sucked. 

And if the universe didn’t force these experiences on me, I wouldn’t have participated willingly. 

But from the ashes of each experience, there came flowers of wisdom and growth. 

After 2 weeks of crying in Hawaii, I channeled all of my pain into learning copywriting under Dan…

And my copywriting skills made a great leap forward. 

My father’s death and the legal battle forced me to dive deep into inner child work…

To heal the parts of me that were wounded and experiencing pain…

And to master that process for myself. 

I’m grateful for that now. 

Other entrepreneurs have similar experiences. 

Justin Goff, for example, had a week where his girlfriend broke up with him, and he lost his only client. (I think he’s fine with me sharing this, as he’s shared this story publicly a lot)

That was right before he made his “great leap forward” and started launching his own online products. 

I know another copywriter who was dumped by his girlfriend, lost a copywriting client, and his grandfather died in the same week. 

He also made a great leap forward. 

Life is filled with experiences like this, and depending on how you respond…

These can be your greatest moments. 

They can be your “great leaps forward.”

Going through tough experiences is inevitable as you level-up. 

Naturally, as you make more m0ney, as you heal your inner child, and as you grow, you will need to let go of the wounded parts of yourself to get to where you want to go in your life. 

That’s the beauty of it all.